Set aside a quiet time that won't be disturbed by others. Parents may want to talk to each child individually, tailoring the conversation to their age and level of understanding. Choose a private, personal, space-like home that provides comfort and security. Avoid doing it in public areas, as where distractions and the lack of privacy may inhibit the free expression of emotions and tender conversation.
Semasa perbualan, gunakan bahasa yang mudah dan elakkan jargon atau istilah perubatan yang kompleks untuk mengelakkan kekeliruan. Ibu bapa boleh merancang lebih awal apa yang hendak dikatakan dan menjangkakan soalan yang mungkin timbul. Menulis apa yang hendak dikatakan dan berlatih perbualan boleh membantu.
If they are unsure about the treatment outcomes, parents can be honest with their children, for example, by saying, "We are not sure how well this treatment will work, but we will keep you updated throughout." For the younger children, telling them that there are also plans for their care in the midst of uncertainty and chaos can also be reassuring. Parents can also encourage the child to write down what they want to know from the doctor at the next visit. Alternatively, parents can note their queries and let them know they will seek answers on their behalf. Not everything needs to be shared at once; take time to pace the conversation with themselves and the children.
Menerangkan kanser kepada kanak-kanak boleh menjadi mencabar. Berikut adalah beberapa petua tentang cara berkomunikasi dengan kanak-kanak tentang kanser dengan jelas dan sensitiviti:
Apabila terdapat banyak perkara untuk diceritakan, bahagikan berita atau maklumat tersebut kepada bahagian-bahagian yang lebih kecil. Bincangkan secara konkrit apa itu kanser, di mana ia terletak di dalam badan, bagaimana ia mempengaruhi badan, pelan rawatan dan potensi kesan sampingan. Ramai kanak-kanak sering ingin tahu tentang apa itu kanser dan mereka tidak mempunyai beban emosi yang diunjurkan atau ketakutan seperti yang dimiliki oleh ramai orang dewasa tentang kanser.
Find out what children already know and what they want to know. Create a safe space for them to share what they've learned or observed, whether from direct or indirect sources. Allow them to ask freely. All kinds of questions should be permitted; there are no “bad” questions. Allowing their concerns and fears to surface and addressing them may be more important than trying to give them the right facts.
Children’s interpretations will vary based on their developmental stage, as will the misunderstandings they have. For instance, a younger child might fill in the gaps with imagination and self-centered thoughts, such as: “Grandma died in the hospital. Dad is in the hospital now, so he will die too,” or “Mom is sick because I made her upset by not clearing my toys.” Therefore, it's crucial to ensure that they have accurate and age-appropriate information to avoid any distorted understanding or distressing assumptions.
Pastikan perbualan tertumpu pada masa kini tanpa meramalkan masa depan. Terangkan bagaimana kanser mungkin menjejaskan kehidupan seharian dan rutin mereka sekarang, seperti siapa yang akan menghantar mereka ke sekolah atau berada di sana apabila mereka pulang ke rumah.
Pastikan kanak-kanak tahu bahawa mereka masih disayangi dan dijaga walaupun telah didiagnosis kanser dan perubahan dalam kehidupan keluarga. Akui bahawa temu janji dan rawatan yang kerap akan menjejaskan masa bersama keluarga, tetapi yakinkan mereka tentang kasih sayang dan penjagaan berterusan kita. Ini membantu meningkatkan rasa selamat mereka dan mengurangkan perasaan cemas dan terbiar.
Additionally, it is important to reassure children that it's perfectly alright for them to enjoy themselves despite a parent's cancer diagnosis. Emphasize that their happiness is important. They can still have fun and be happy with their friends or at school during these difficult times.
Benarkan kanak-kanak meluahkan perasaan mereka selepas membincangkan tentang kanser. Kanak-kanak yang lebih muda, khususnya, mungkin menghadapi kesukaran untuk meluahkan emosi mereka. Beritahu mereka bahawa adalah perkara biasa untuk berasa sedih, marah, atau takut. Galakkan mereka untuk berkongsi perasaan mereka dan yakinkan mereka bahawa tidak mengapa untuk bercakap dengan anda atau orang dewasa lain yang dipercayai. Dapatkan sokongan daripada profesional seperti pekerja sosial, kaunselor, atau ahli psikologi jika anda memerlukan bantuan untuk menyokong kanak-kanak dalam menghadapi penyakit tersebut.
In summary, talking to children about cancer is challenging, but it's important not to leave them in the dark. This 2-part article guides approaching these discussions, highlighting the significance of involving trusted adults for support and initiating the conversation promptly after diagnosis. It also emphasizes the importance of keeping children updated about any developments, the value of timing, and selecting an appropriate setting. Moreover, it emphasizes the need for using straightforward language and clarifying any misconceptions. Lastly, it is important to address children’s emotions, providing reassurance, and reaffirming the unwavering love parents have for their children, regardless of the cancer condition.
"Pengetahuan pakar bermakna penjagaan kanser yang lebih baik"
Ditulis oleh:
Cik Jaclyn Lee
Pakar Klinik Penjagaan Sokongan dan Paliatif
Pusat Kanser OncoCare
